18 January 2015

People & Their Judgements

Hey everyone! So I know the title of this post isn't exactly the most exciting title to get you to click on the blog post and read this post, so if you're reading this thank you but there have been a few things now that I have wanted to address. I won't be including any images in this post as I want you to focus purely on the content. It's not exactly the happiest of posts but it is something that I need to get out.

Commenting on Body Shapes and Sizes 
Recently I have noticed on twitter a lot of horrible comments and hatred towards slimmer girls declaring their size and shops choosing slimmer manikins to model their clothes on. It has been making me so angry. I saw a girl that I've been speaking to on twitter for a while now post a photo on instagram and underneath was a comment that said 'You don't need to declare your size as it makes bigger people feel like shit'. That comment made me so angry purely because if it was a bigger person who was declaring their size she wouldn't have said anything. The girl was obviously proud of how she looked and wanted to express that proudness through a photo. What on earth is wrong with that.

I am getting so sick and tired of the constant battle between bigger people and slimmer people. As someone who isn't the slimmest person in the world but not the biggest either I just want everyone to shut up and let people be happy with how they look. When it comes to women body image is an incredibly touchy subject and it just shouldn't be. We should be empowering other women and encouraging others to be happy with who they are instead of the constant 'you're so fat, you're so skinny' debate that happens all the time. If someone is naturally slim do not go and tell them to eat a burger. It's so offensive. If someone is slightly bigger don't go and tell them that they shouldn't wear shorts or leggings. Confidence is the hardest thing to build up as I'm sure a lot of you know yourself so why shatter somebody else's?

If a friend of yours or someone you care about is really suffering with their weight and maybe has an eating disorder then by all means help them through it. Help them get back on their feet and encourage them to do certain things. If you're not close to a certain person but are just making fun of their weight then you need to step back and look in the mirror as to the sort of person you are. We are all human, we all have feelings. If someone is happier being bigger and wearing shorts and leggings then good on them for having that sort of confidence. If someone is slimmer but happier then let them be. Unless someone's health is massively at risk weight shouldn't be judged. If a person is truly happy that's all that matters.

I've dropped almost 2 sizes this year and I couldn't be happier. But I know people who have put on 2 sizes and even happier than me! Unless your health is at serious risk and you are worried and scared then please ignore any comments or negativity you get. How skinny or fat you are doesn't determine your beauty. If you are happy with who you are and you are trying to be the best person that you can possibly be you are beautiful.

Commenting On A Person's Sexual Orientation 
This is something that I am so sick and tired of hearing about now. I'm fed up of reading about a celebrities relationship with their own sex, or seeing people commend a person on coming out. Why should who you have feelings for be commended or commented on? I really don't get it. I mean yeah I am proud that a person has had the confidence to come out by why should we applaud them? It should be a natural thing to be happy with who you love not something that's seen as brave.

I see comments day in and day out say 'It's so unnatural to be with a women, or I hate seeing women kiss or men kiss' and I sit there like what on earth is wrong with you? Love is love. Some people are attracted to their own sex just like some people are attracted to their opposite sex. I think it's ridiculous that we consider one the norm and the other not the norm.Love is love and should be celebrated no matter who it is with.

I have so many friends who are gay and who are extremely happy but they get instantly upset by remarks made. This world needs to become more acceptable to others life choices. Whether a girl falls in love with another girl or a boy falls in love with another boy we should celebrate it. This is going to sound ridiculously corny but to me there is more hatred in the world than there is love so to actually see two people no matter their sex fall in love and be happy should be celebrated. The sooner this world becomes a more acceptable place the less hate crimes will be committed.

I am a Catholic and I've been given one or two remarks saying that I obviously agree with everything the Bible says. I don't. Yes I prefer men but that doesn't mean I look down on others who are attracted to their own sex. Love is love. Be happy for those who are lucky enough to experience it no matter who they are experiencing it with. Not everyone is that lucky. People really need to become more accepting of others life choices as nobody's relationships affect you.

Online Bullying 
The final thing I'll mention here is Cyber Bullying. I'm lucky enough to not be a victim of it however I have friends who are constantly attacked on tumblr, twitter and the horrific site guru-gossiper. If you are reading this and have cyber-bullied on any of these sites I have one question...what are you gaining from this?

One of my friends Gabriella (Velvetgh0st) on you-tube constantly gets attacked on this horrific site by how she looks. Zoella gets constant abuse because of her book and the fact she apparently does nothing with her life. Even innocent people on twitter who do nothing wrong get targeting and judged purely because of who they are and what they look like. It's absolutely disgusting.

I'm get so sick of seeing the following statements. 'It's called an opinion' 'It's called freedom of speech'. No. It's disgusting. I've had chats with Gabriella about the comments she has and sometimes she has been so upset it has made me upset. Seeing someone you care able get so hurt and upset by remarks from people they don't even know is horrific. Especially when you know you can't do anything to stop it. The other night there was a programme on called Cyber-bully and all I kept seeing was that it should be something shown in schools. Whilst I agree with this I also think it should be shown in universities and work places. Cyber-bullying doesn't just happen when you are a teen. It happens at all ages. I see 30 year olds be victims of bullying. Even celebrities are targets of online bullying and it's just disgusting.

People need to realize that telling someone their ugly, or that they are useless, or that they are fat or too skinny or their blog is crap or even just bitching about them to other people on an online forum like guru-gossiper is cyber-bullying. It needs to stop. There are too many stories nowadays of people who commit suicide because of the nasty comments that are being made about them. If you don't like somebody fine. You don't need to like them. Not everyone can be liked by everyone. We all know this. But keep your horrendous, nasty opinions to yourself. Don't share them online in a forum or on twitter or Facebook where you are encouraging others to bully and humiliate somebody else. It's horrific.

If you are one of this cyberbullies or trolls, STOP. Just stop. You never know how the other people could be feeling and what they are thinking. You never know what they can do next. What you don't want is your name suddenly appearing on the news because the person you bullied did something that was because of a comment you made. Police have plenty of ways to track down bullies now so just stop it.

At the end of the day all you know about the people you bitch about online is their name. You don't know their story or what they have been through to get to where they are. Yes some of these people share their lives online but even then it's a tiny portion. You don't know how broken they are behind the screen or what they are thinking or feeling. Don't be another troll. Get off the internet and out into the real world where you can become a better human.

Conclusion. 
This post was definitely longer than I intended it to be but if you have go this far then I commend you and I hope if you fall into any of the categories mentioned you take time to think and wonder if this is the sort of person you want to be. Do you want to be seen for damaging somebody's confidence, or causing serious harm, or even being a horrible, nasty troll? Everyone can change. If you are reading this and have thought oh yeah that's me then fine, you can still change, you can better yourself and become a great person.

A lot of these subjects are extremely touchy but if you are the victim of any of these things and need somebody to talk to I'm always here. You can tweet me at xbellefleurx or even email me at fleur_griffin@hotmail.co.uk. I'll listen and help you the best I can.

What are your thoughts on these subjects?
Hugs and Kisses
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5 comments

  1. This was such an honest post and I completely agree with everything you've said. We need more open-minded and accepting people like you in the world! xxx

    www.sorryimearly.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much! I'm glad you agree!! It just angers me so much I felt like I needed to address these things. I'm glad you feel the same!! :) xx

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  2. This is such a great post- well said! I agree with everything you said, I can't understand why anyone would unnecessarily comment on someone's size/appearance/sexual orientation- there's just no need. I hope any bullies who read this post think again about what they say!

    www.heavenlyclutter.blogspot.com
    xo

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    1. I hope so too. It's ridiculous. People need to be more accepting of others. Nobody's life affects anybody else's so just let them be happy with their decisions. It just angers me so much.

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  3. really agree with your comments on sexual orientation! I recently came back from Bulgaria, a country that's very antigay! It was extremely hard to listen to the comments being made but I kept my cool. I decided unfortunately that culture plays a massive part, they've grown up in anti gay surroundings and I can't blame them for that. I'm just very lucky to have been brought up in such an accepting country! xx
    www.emilyjanewebb.co.uk

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